Mistake. The first day of gym class came and of course, I was the only kid who looked like someone at dork boot camp. It didn't help either, that my gym clothes were really la
me to begin with. My mom and I had a little battle of wills while back-to-school shopping. I wanted new clothes for gym class... she didn't want to waste her money on new gym clothes... so we compromised and I bought the cheapest, tackiest things K-Mart sold.And I should also mention that my junior high was definitely not the place to stand out as a dorky white kid. It was one of those schools where the rich kids weren't the ruling class - they huddled together for protection from the gang bangers. One of my classmates was pregnant at 13 (13!), and another killed someone from a rival gang. Not that it was a really hardcore school or anything like that. It was just, you know, less sheltered.
Back to gym class. I suffered in my K-Mart finery for a semester or so, then went to the Regency Mall Gap and bought a pair of boxer shorts. Men's large, too. Sheesh. I wore my new shorts proudly during seventh grade gym, and when gym class was over, I kept them around.
Over the years they've become my go-to shorts. What should I wear when I come home from work? What do I do when it's Saturday morning and I don't feel like putting on "real" clothes? What can I wear to the gym? Ah, my versatile shorts. I studied in them during college, relaxed by many a campfire in them, layed around in them reading a long chain of books.
They faded as time went on. The elastic stretched out, and the fabric got thinner and thinner until it started to rip. This past weekend I noticed a big hole in their backside... I knew it was time to say goodbye.
So thank you, shorts. We had 14 comfortable years together. You were wonderful as clothing, and I'm sure you'll be great rags as well.
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