Preparation

The big 3-0. It's in two weeks. I'm not particularly upset or worried about it, but it has been on my mind a lot lately. Much more than a birthday (and my golden birthday at that! ...Do people care about golden birthdays?), it feels like the start of something new. Maybe it's because I've just finished school and am looking down a looooong strech of road called "the rest of my career". Maybe it's because I've been thinking about the next big phases of life - the personal ones. Whatever the reason, I've got "30" on the brain and it's tied up with all these thoughts of the way I want to live my life and the things I want to do.

I'll write more about those things later... tonight I'm thinking more about the person I've been these last 29 years, 11 months and two weeks. Good mixed with bad, mistakes mixed with good choices, etc. Many of my actions have been guided by a few different ideas, and I recently realized that I've never written them down. So... yeah. I'm going to write them down.

1. No man is better than any other
I love this. I think I heard it first said by a Norwegian cross-country skier (Vegard Ulvang, you fox!), and it has stuck with me ever since. There are people on this earth who are smarter, more attractive, more charismatic, and nicer than me... but they're not any better. In turn, I'm no better than anyone else, no matter how sexy and brilliant I may be (3 snaps in a Z formation!). There's no reason for me to ever be arrogant then. There's also no reason to be insecure.

2. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing
Full disclosure: I hated this Helen Keller quote when I first read it. Nothing? How dare you say someone's life is nothing. I learned to read it without being defensive though, and now think it's a great way to live. When I see the adventure in the little details of my quotidian life, I'm much happier. And when I look at my overall life as an adventure, I tend to take more chances, try new things.

3. Listen to yourself
Or myself. I've always felt that there is a voice of clarity inside me, and if I can just ignore all the rest of the noise (what I think will impress people, what I think I'm supposed to want, what would be easier) I can figure out exactly what is the right thing to do. I'll make the right decisions and I'll make them for the right reasons. I just have to sit very still and listen.

I'm actually sitting very still right now. And I'm listening. The inner voice, it's telling me to have a snack and go to bed. But wait, there's more... It's also telling me to watch some internet TV. Oh voice. You've never led me astray.

The good news that makes me so sad.

    

For years, long before I met Oliver, I thought it would be kind of cool to do a green card interview. The marriage kind, like you see in the movies whenever two characters get married solely so one can get U.S. residency. A sour-faced government pencil pusher takes you into a little room and asks you details about your relationship. Where did you meet? What are the names of your husband's siblings, and what is the order of their birth? What color is your wife's toothbrush?

Real life is a little different than the movies, of course.  In real life the interview comes years after your wedding, not weeks. After your foreigner spouse has had the probationary green card for two years s/he applies for a permanent card... and the government decides what to do with you.

Do they trust you? Do they believe, based on the stacks of paperwork you have provided, that your marriage is real? If they're not sure... interview!

I had my fingers crossed. I really did. This would be our big chance to prove our love to the world! It would be like Jeopardy, only a special version of Jeopardy with all questions centering around us! How's that for an ego stroke? Someone wants to know all about us! No, not just someone. The U.S. government. Our nation has taken a keen interest in the most mundane details of our life. He drinks his coffee black! She loves NPR! He pays the bills! We have a Netflix account!

Alas, when Oliver brought in the mail today his approval letter was in it. All done. The paperwork was believable. No interview for us. This is a good thing. It will save us stress, hassle, and a day of vacation time. We can move forward, plan vacations out of the country, etc. I'm really glad... I'm just a little sad at the same time.

Hi there.

Less than two weeks left of school, and this is where I'm going to try and spend my time until then. 

It's hard though, when the instrument of my productivity is also the instrument of my distraction. Curse you internet!

See you later.